calm my anxious heart

I have a list of books that I hope to read this break and the first one I started is called Calm My Anxious Heart: A Woman's Guide to Finding Contentment by Linda Dillow. The reason I chose to read this one first is because I feel as though even though I have developed more patience over the semester, that didn't mean I was necessarily content with the way things were turning out. So far, this book has been amazing. There was a little story that was in it that really put God's control in my life in perspective so I thought I would share it with you:

"I need oil," said an ancient monk, so he planted an olive sapling. "Lord," he prayed, "it needs rain so that its tender roots may drink and swell. Send gentle showers." And the Lord sent gentle showers. "Lord," prayed the monk, "my tree needs sun. Send sun, I pray thee." And the sun shone, gilding the dripping clouds. "Now frost, my Lord, to brace its tissues," cried the monk. And behold, the little tree stood sparkling with frost, but at evening it died.

Then the monk sought the cell of a brother monk and told his strange experience. "I, too, planted a little tree," he said, "and see! It thrives well. But I entrust my tree to God. He who made it knows better what it needs than a man like me. I laid no condition. I fixed not ways or means. 'Lord, send what it needs,' I prayed, 'storm or sunshine, wind, rain, or frost. Thou hast made it and Thou dost know'" (P.19).


This story was so good for me to hear because it reminded me of how often I pray for what I think I need, when really I should be praying for God to send me what He knows I need. He knows me better than I ever will and I love the quote: "He who made it knows better what it needs than a man like me." This is what God is telling me every day:

"Morgan, let Me be the Blessed Controller. Surrender. Accept my timing. Accept my ways. Accept my outcome. Let your trust be in Me alone. Morgan, make secret choices that will honor Me. Though no one sees your choices or knows how difficult they are, make them for Me."