live. laugh. love.

Joel =)

2010-03-24T08:46:00.001-07:00

bring it on...

2009-12-08T16:17:00.001-08:00

finals week. I am more than ready.

ahhh!

2009-11-03T09:54:00.000-08:00

This morning I registered for the Spring 2010 semester for the LAST TIME IN MY UNDERGRADUATE LIFE!!!!! ahhhh that is such a crazy thought. As I scrolled down my degree guide to see just one section left that was marked INCOMPLETE...I never thought it would come as fast as it did. This is such a weird feeling. There are only 179 days left until I officially graduate! :) WOOOO HOOO CLASS OF 2010!!!! WE ARE ALMOST THERE!

on a different note: this morning my life was drastically altered at starbucks. I got their new fall drink PEPPERMINT WHITE MOCHA and it was christmas in my mouth! This is my new favorite drink and I regret only ordering a tall...

cute!!!

2009-10-28T17:50:00.001-07:00

God is so faithful...ALWAYS

2009-10-27T10:19:00.000-07:00

This past weekend I attended a retreat called NEXT STEP. It was for those interested in "missional" living whether that be stateside or overseas, but making your life all about proclaiming Christ's name. Being intentional. Making Him famous. I went into this weekend really praying that my heart would be softened to the things that the Lord would have me learn and hear from the mentors and much like Christ always does...

HE ROCKED MY WORLD IN BIG BEAR.

I have never heard God speak to me in such loud and clear ways. He was faithful in answering prayers that I didn't expect to be answered in such a quick manner. Literally, He knocked my to my knees praying with extreme gratitude and thanks for the awesome, sovereign God that He is. I feel like I could write a lot of the things that happened this week, so if you would like to know feel free to email me and I would be happy to get together and chat.

I am writing this blog to encourage you to put all your trust in Him. He is faithful and always there for us, even in those moments of life when we turn our back on Him. Always, always, always: trust in the Lord, delight yourself in the Lord, commit your way unto the Lord, and rest in Him (Psalm 37).

quote of the week

2009-10-27T10:00:00.000-07:00

"He learned not to bind God by the limits of his own faith. He asked, knowing that God, who heard, was able."

In reference to George Muller's faith in the Lord, Jesus Christ

RA training

2009-08-17T17:22:00.000-07:00

I absolutely love the RA staff that I am apart of this year. All of the women are awesome and truly have a heart ready to serve the Lord. Being back for training has been amazing and such a great way to start the year for me. I changed my picture on this blog today because I saw it and was reminded of the importance of laughter.

Laughter can seriously be the best medicine for anything, well besides love, and you just feel better when you do it :) It seems like our staff is always laughing when we are together. haha OKay so this is a lame blog entry, but I thought I would share how much I am really enjoying my staff this year :)

the summer for change

2009-07-26T13:01:00.000-07:00

Hello blogger world! I realized it has been quite some time since I have blogged, so I thought I would write a quick one just to update everyone on my life since school has been out:

-AFRICA WAS AMAZING!!! There will definitely be a future blog including pictures describing that trip that I took back in MAY. Africa changed my life in more ways than I thought imaginable: God did GREAT things there.

-I have been working for the CBU bookstore this summer and I LOVE it! I feel as though I have been making some really great friendships and all my "superiors" are simply amazing.

-Our church has been going through some big things, but all in all I can see the Lord moving heavily through all of it.

I think that covers all the major things that have happened in my life so far this summer, at least as far as I can think of. I move back on campus two weeks from tomorrow for RA training. I can't believe how soon it came!! I hope everyone is having a fun and safe summer..see you all soon!!

All dogs go to heaven

2009-04-22T20:58:00.000-07:00

So tonight at church I walk into the room and what do I find? The little doggy laying it's head on the Bible! It was so cute and it looked like she was READING the Bible. I HAD to take a picture so I could put it on here.

Isn't she absolutely adorable??

little green thumb

2009-04-21T13:19:00.000-07:00

I received this little pot for our PASS THE TORCH event in our individual areas for being an RA next year and look at it! It is already sprouting! I got so excited when I looked up from the kitchen sink and saw the little guy poking its head up through the dirt. I just thought I would share this moment :)

time-out from life

2009-04-18T15:18:00.000-07:00

OKKK life seems so hectic now that we are in finals and I have soooo much going on. I feel as though I have been getting barely any sleep and been working overtime to get all my projects done and done well at that.

Today I decided to take a "time-out" from life. Oh man, I used to hate time-outs when I was younger, but I have never had anything so needed in awhile. I call it a time-out instead a break because it was a lot longer than it should have been and I probably shouldn't have; so when you do things that you shouldn't do you get put in time-out when you are little. ha ha OK maybe that sounds stupid since I am not little, but it was AMAZING. Let me tell you:

I slept in until ELEVEN am today and then went to MUMBLES with Erica and Greta. ahhh :) Above is a picture of what I got: cappuccino and peanut butter yogurt with mini-white chocolate chips, tiny pieces of cookie dough, strawberries and a little fudge drizzled on top. D.E.L.I.C.I.O.U.S.

Be Courageous.

2009-04-17T16:05:00.001-07:00

Today was our "Commissioning Chapel" for ISP and it was so emotional. I feel like at the first chapel when we were first being prayed over I couldn't control my emotions and I was definitely crying. Like I saw drops of mascara falling onto my shirt. Oh man. That many people praying at one time, worshipping, and holding the hands of those that you are about to go overseas with gets me everytime.

This years theme for us is COURAGEOUS. To be bold and courageous while we are on the field and trust in Him. The picture above is our shirts for this year [sorry not such good quality picture]. I didn't realize how soon I leave until chapel today: 17 DAYS!!! ahhhh that is insane. I can't believe how fast it is coming!

Thanks so much for all of your continued prayers and for those of you that prayed for not only my team during chapel, but for all the teams there.

<3

MAN week

2009-04-03T13:10:00.000-07:00

This past week has been MAN week here at CBU and I have absolutely loved it. All the men have been growing out the best mustache to see who could win, competed in a 3 on 3 basketball tournament yesterday with a dunking contest, held a "service with a smile" dinner on Tuesday night, any many other ones but these were by far my favorite.

BEST MUSTACHE:

I just love this one because I think it is awesome seeing all these guys on campus with the funniest facial hair. I saw some with braids coming down from their chin, some with designs buzzed in, some that looked like dirty, old men, some that couldn't really grow much, and some that could grow more than they would ever need to unless they lived someplace really, really cold. I just got word that KEVIN KISH was the winner!!! CONGRATS to him :) I think he was the one who had the design sketched into his hair???? (am I right???)

THREE ON THREE:

This was fun to watch! The boys get so competitive, but there were the few that were dancing on the court, playing with afro's on, going really fast, and then some that were just messing around the whole time. JsTOVALL was the DJ and he did a mighty fine job at that. The championship game was exciting to watch because it was Bruski (aka MARK ROUSSIN), Ceasar (aka SPEEDY GONZALES in my book), and Arthur (aka LEGIT) versus JJ (aka SOON TO BE A DADDY), Rick (aka DFLO), and Alex (aka FRACE). [I don't know all the subs names sorry] The game was intense needless to say. Ceasar shot the winning basket from the three point line and he also won the dunking contest! It was pretty sweet too. He bounced the ball up against the backboard, grabbed it and dunked it so hard!

SERVICE WITH A SMILE:

This was the CUTEST event to me! The men of CBU signed up to be waiters for the women of CBU. They greeted us at the door very nicely dressed and escorted us to our tables individually, always made sure our glasses were full, always had a smile (thus the name), had us write on prayer cards things we would like them to pray for us about, and even said reasons as to why they need and like us in their life (my favorite by far was that without us they couldn't go on dates). Chris Hernandez did a fantastic job at speaking and telling jokes, ha ha oh man and the men playing the piano and guitar along with singing were amazing. I only know Tim Hawley's name from the guitar, but the pianist was amazing!! (sorry I don't know his name). Overall, it was a pretty good night.

I am pleased to say that I feel this MEN week was a hit. I think that all the guys did a great job and seemed very "manly" with their facial hair. I am thankful that there are such solid, Godly men on this campus. Thank you all for being the example that you need to be :)

people you should know

2009-03-13T09:24:00.000-07:00

If you attend CBU, then there are a few people that you should know. Obviously there are more than I am talking about in this blog, but over time I hope to put on a spotlight on all my friends worth spotting :)

Jordan Trivison: Future vice president for the class of 2010 and future president of the world bank. Politically suave. FUNNY. overall GOOD guy. [ladies, if you want to know more just let me know and I'll see what I can do...he's a great catch!! :)]

Josh Christian: Future RA in the UP living area. Most caring and genuine person. FUNNY. overall GOOD guy as well, but could possibly be taken...

Erica Horn: omgosh. I don't even know where to begin. I love this girl. FUTURE roomie. hilarious. basically a pro athlete. All-around the type of girl any man would want :)

Here is a picture of all of us at our best. If you don't know one of them you should definitely take the time to get to know them!!! :)

inside joke

2009-03-07T16:52:00.000-08:00

I think there are only two people in the world that will get this.

ha ha ha :)

more than 100%. what does that even mean??

2009-02-10T09:13:00.000-08:00

I have heard all my life that I need to give more than 100% and frankly, in those times where I was frustrated I wanted to scream, "IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO GIVE MORE THAN 100%!!" I was always confused as to what exactly that statement meant.

Then yesterday I received an email that showed what it means to give more than 100% from a mathematical perspective.

IF: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is represented as: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

We can use this to mathematically figure out what we need in order to give more than 100%. For example:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K= 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11= 98%
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E= 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5= 96%
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E= 1+20+20+9+20+21=4+5= 100%

"While hard work and knowledge will get you close, and attitude will get you there, none of those put you over the top." But now, take a look at what the love of God will get you:

L-O-V-E-O-F-G-O-D= 12+15+22+5+15+6+7+15+4= 101%

Finally, I know how to give more than 100%. I need to have to love of God to put me over the top. Isn't that so interesting?! I was intrigued and frankly never thought to even do that. Obviously, there are more words that could be done, but I really enjoyed this example. If anyone wants to read the email, just let me know and I could email it to you. There are more interesting things in relation to mathematics, but this is one that stuck out to me.

it's true. i actually did it.

2009-02-04T14:31:00.000-08:00

I deleted my facebook. I never realized how much of a commotion this would cause. Today, I got text messages from over I don't know how many people asking me why I deleted my facebook account. I think that is hilarious.

My apologies to those that said that the facebook world "just wouldn't be the same" without me, but I just don't see the point in it anymore. Sure it is a great way to keep in touch with those further away, but so is the phone. I am too distracted by it and this is not a time for me to be distracted. That doesn't mean it is a permanent thing, but for now I need some time away from it.

I hope that you guys understand. :)

and the spotlight goes to...

2009-01-28T15:54:00.000-08:00

Mical Bell. This girl is simply amazing. I wanted to put a picture up, but we seriously have hundreds if not thousands and there were so many that I would want to put up here. Maybe by the time I finish writing this I will decide on one.

Mical saved me; from me. I know that sounds weird, but seriously. We met our senior year when God so kindly placed us on the same club volleyball team. We will both admit that we weren't fans of each other: she was a pastor's kid that thought she was better than everyone else and I was the ghetto-fab child from "moval" with a huge chip on her shoulder that also thought I was better than everyone else. Needless to say, through our differences somehow we became BFFL and our friendship has been one of the most meaningful in my life. Mical and her family showed me what it meant to live fearing God and (nervous chuckle) what it even meant to simply follow Him. I am truly thankful for her and everything that she is in my life. We have laughed, cried, lived together, helped keep each other accountable, traveled the US together and even traveled the world together!! I don't know what I would do without her. I love you and your family more than any words could ever express.

With that said: Adam; you are one lucky man. Hurt her and I hurt you :)

riverside's BETTER side

2009-01-27T10:28:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I went with some friends on a hike up Mt. Rubidoux here in Riverside. I can't believe I have never been their before! Never again will I drive back to Moreno Valley to go hiking on the mountain behind my house because from now on I will take the short 10 minute drive down the street to this place. It was absolutely gorgeous! I mean the company that I was with was also a huge added bonus, but seriously. Look at this picture. I contrasted it a little bit more because it made it a bit more dramatic, but we could not have gone on a better day. The weather was absolutely perfect and there weren't too many people.

This is definitely Riverside's BETTER side :)

little drummer boy

2009-01-26T14:08:00.000-08:00

As you may know I like to "gut" songs as to figure out their meanings; I mean, why do I like them and what am I really singing about anyway? My last song was "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing." I seriously love that song and I listen to it on a daily basis and more recently I have begun to have a liking for that famous Christmas carol: the little drummer boy. Judge as you may, but normally I have never really been a fan of this song and then one day I heard the version as sung by "The Almost." Oh man. Serious fan now.

Let me just paint the picture that God painted for me:

The song is about a boy (there is no biblical evidence that this story is true, but I think it's a great depiction of how we should be) that was told to go and visit baby Jesus in the manger; they were going to bring great gifts out of honor for the King. So the little boy goes with them and when he gets there he sees all the great gifts that have been brought. Feeling a bit discouraged and probably embarrassed that he didn't have anything "fit for a King" to give, he peers into the manger and says: I'm sorry that I don't have gifts to give you that would be fit for a King because I am poor too. All I have is a drum and I know how to play, would you like me to play for you? [I picture this little boy standing there with a drum, look from the manger to Mary with an expression of both eyebrows going up and a slight frown-type lip pucker because he is uncertain of what her response will be and insecure of his less-fortunate tidings.] The song goes on to say that Mary nods as in agreement that he should play for him and so the little boy does just that: he plays. But he's not just playing his drum, the song says he plays his best for him. Then the song ends with the picture of baby Jesus smiling up at the little drummer boy.

I think that is such a beautiful picture of how happy God is with us when we simply give Him our best. He does not demand that we be perfect, rich, talented in all areas, or even highly successful. He just wants us to give Him our best. All throughout scripture there are examples of this. Looking at the story of Cain and Abel, God was displeased with Cain's offering because he did not give God his best (Genesis 4). No matter how small, poor, or lacking in whatever we may think we are lacking in: God still desires our best and smiles when we give it to Him. Think of the poor widow's offering in Mark 12:41-44. She gave less than everyone else there, but the most in comparison to how much she actually had. I hope when you hear this song, you are reminded that all God wants from us is our best. We don't have to be perfect at everything, the most successful, and we definitely don't have to have the latest trendy possessions to be right in the eyes of God. Just give Him your best and He will do the same for you.

I know it's a Christmas song, but listen to it again...

october 2, 2008

2009-01-20T16:46:00.000-08:00

I blogged on this day, last year, about a prayer that I had. It was about a song by Brandon Heath:

"...Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me your heart for the once forgotten..."

Over the course of the past few months I have definitely seen God answering this prayer from various little things He was showing me in my life and the life of others, but then I was a camp counselor this past weekend. Yeahhh. Let me just say this: God answered this prayer from a few months ago in ways I don't think I even wanted Him too. I guess it's true that you should be careful what you pray for.

~He showed me the immense pain in other people's lives

~He definitely gave me a new love for these kids I work with from everything I learned and was told during our group discussions

~I had a girl cry harder than I have seen anyone cry in my arms for nearly an hour. The type of cry where if I let go she would have definitely fallen to the ground

~I had those "difficult" kids that have been so far-reached from all of us that it seemed impossible to reach them actually open up in personal conversation and admit all the "sins" in their life: that conversation also ended in tears

I can give more and more examples from this past weekend, but this is just a blog and not a book that I am writing. Lets just say God gave me His eyes this past weekend and even though I am truly thankful for everything that happened up in those mountains, I am also left with this pain in my heart for everything that I saw. It made me think how hurt God must feel. I felt so much guilt for everything that I have done in the past because if me, being just a simple person, felt so much heartache for these kids, I can't even begin to imagine how God feels everyday. I'm not gunna lie: this weekend was one of the hardest ones for me. I feel so emotionally drained.

Please pray for all the kids that were up at that camp. God was definitely doing things and I know He will continue to do things, but I am just afraid some of these kids were on a "church camp high" and I don't want the things that were talked about up on that mountain to be forgotten about just because now we are down the mountain.

define: to explain or identify the nature or essential qualities of something

2009-01-16T10:55:00.000-08:00

During my devotions this past month or so, I have been into this concept of completely breaking down single verses or chapters. In essence: completely gutting the Word to figure out the meaning.

I have been "gutting" 1Samuel for some time now and last night in my studies I came across quite an interesting word: in.

It is such a simple word and we use it all the time, but what exactly does it mean? It is a preposition so we know it is a connecting word, but what does that mean?

I know it may seem irrelevant to be stuck on this one word in my study since there are other words that I could obviously choose to dwell on, but then I started thinking: even though in is a small word, it actually has big meaning. Think about it. When we use this word, we are usually using it as a connection word with God. For example: "In His Name" and "In Him we pray." So I pulled out my pocket dictionary; yes, I tend to carry a pocket dictionary; and these are the definitions that stuck out to me:
~contained by
~wearing
~with regard to
~because of
~those in power

Complete all those definitions with "Him" and that little word "in" seems so much more powerful doesn't it?
~contained by HIM
~wearing HIM
~with regard to HIM
~because of HIM
~those in power [HIM]

Ok so maybe you found this to be a pointless blog because that word is not as big as I am making it out to be, but for some reason it stuck out so I thought I would share what I learned. Next time you use one of those phrases, I hope you think about how much power those simple statements can actually have.

God is oh so faithful. always.

2009-01-11T22:42:00.000-08:00

Yesterday a friend reminded me that I need to be praying for God's will and not mine. I thought that I had been and then after our conversation, I realized I was still holding the "pen" to my life instead of letting God write my story. Later in the night I was reading in Philippians and this is what I came across:

"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known to God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus" (4:4-7).

That was in the English Standard Version. Now in the Morgan Version it translated as this:

"Morgan, always give thanks with a joyous heart. God is at work so please stop worrying about everything. Pray about all these things on your heart, but remember to be thankful no matter what the outcome. If you want an answer than you need to communicate with Me because you know that I will always answer you. ALong the way I will help you guard your heart and your mind because my only Son died for you."

He totally spoke to me and then today, God absolutely blew my socks off. He answered a specific prayer I have been praying for nearly 3 years and the only thing I could do was be on my knees crying with thankfulness. Then in a matter of hours God answered another HUGE prayer that has been on my heart and totally provided in a way I never thought possible. I blogged at the start of break that I felt God closed a chapter in my life and was starting a new one this semester and I can already see the process beginning. God is oh so faithful. Always.

freerice.com

2009-01-07T23:32:00.000-08:00

Everyone knows that there is extreme poverty in Africa, that is no secret. Something that everyone does not know though is about: freerice.com

I want to encourage people to please go to this website and be an active participant. It is not hard at all and in fact, you can help send rice to people in Africa by simply answering questions from various subjects. FreeRice has two goals: 1) Provide education to everyone for free and 2)help end world hunger by providing rice to hungry people for free. Instead of typing out why I think you should do this, please just watch the youtube video below.

it's quite unfortunate

2009-01-05T16:04:00.000-08:00

I first saw this YOUTUBE video in my comparitive religions class with Prof. Stumpf. Anyone that has taken her knows how much she absolutely loves to use YOUTUBE in class. This is one of the many videos that she showed us and today I somehow stumbled upon it again. Yes, it is an interview with an Atheist, but I think that the things he says are actually pretty good. I think you should watch it and see for yourself. It's quite unfortunate than an Atheist has a better grasp on Christianity than most "Christians" in society do today. I think it is because this man has obviously studied the Bible in order to prepare himself for when people ask him why does he not believe, he has a good answer. Well "good" in the sense that he thinks he is defending his beliefs, or unbeliefs?

a simple rubber band

2009-01-04T14:20:00.000-08:00

This morning at church, my pastor gave quite a compelling message about things we should expect from 2009. Something that I found interesting was a certain analogy he used to describe what God wants to do with us and the reasoning why.

The first time I heard about the concept of God "stretching" me was in preparation for my first overseas short-term mission trip a few years back. I thought that "stretching" was something that only happened in unfamiliar places and that it was unpleasant and undesirable. I have quickly come to find out since that trip that being stretched is a good thing. It means that you are growing stronger and expanding your boundaries whereas to work within, or out of. When athletes stretch before and after a workout regimen it is 1) extending and elongating muscle fibers, which is why it is called stretching. This is useful because it reduces muscle tension to prevent injury. And 2) it increases blood flow to the muscles and tendons providing the cells with more oxygen and nutrients. This is also important in exercise because it helps provide energy during the workout. Even though stretching prior to a workout and after can sometimes be unpleasant, we all know that in the end it is beneficial and helps to prevent soreness.

When the Bible uses the word "stretch," the outcome of the action is always for the better of that particular situation. For example, God in Exodus 3:20; God says, "So I will stretch out my hand and strike the Egyptians with all the wonders that I will perform among them. After that, he will let you go." The context of this verse is talking about how God saw the affliction that His people were suffering in Egypt and the only way to get the Pharoah's attention is if a "mighty hand" (19) was somehow able to compell him. In this example, "stretching" saved people. There are many other examples throughout scripture, this is just one that I chose to use sorry I am not expounding on it more.

So why do so many of us see being "stretched" as a bad thing? I think it is because when we are being stretched, most times we are uncomfortable in the process. We don't like being stretched to talk to the person next to us on a plane about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ because it would make for an awkward flight, especially if it is long and the person might actually want to get into a discussion that would really make us think about our Faith and be able to defend it. When in reality, stretching is a good thing and also necessary if we are to grow stronger (which is my reasoning for the athlete example).

The example that my pastor used this morning, thus the reasoning for my title, is that of a simple rubber band. It needs to be stretched consistently to maintain elasticity, not necessarily everyday, but often enough. Have you ever had an old rubber band that has been sitting in a drawer for quite some time and when you go to use it, it snaps? That is how we are. We are scared of being stretched so we stay where we are comfortable and then when God tries to use us for something that is uncomfortable or awkward, we snap. We can't do it because we are not used to the action and usually we break. We need to allow God to continuously stretch us because if He doesn't and we just sit there, eventually we are not strong enough and at the first chance of being used, we snap; much like an old, unused rubber band.

This week our church was challenged to wear a rubber band on our wrist to remind us of the goodness of being stretched. Maybe you would like to join us? Whether or not you do, I hope the next time you see or use a rubber band you think of all that God is preparing you for and even if it is uncomfortable or awkward. Embrace being stretched; I promise it is a good thing :)

calm my anxious heart

2008-12-23T21:16:00.000-08:00

I have a list of books that I hope to read this break and the first one I started is called Calm My Anxious Heart: A Woman's Guide to Finding Contentment by Linda Dillow. The reason I chose to read this one first is because I feel as though even though I have developed more patience over the semester, that didn't mean I was necessarily content with the way things were turning out. So far, this book has been amazing. There was a little story that was in it that really put God's control in my life in perspective so I thought I would share it with you:

"I need oil," said an ancient monk, so he planted an olive sapling. "Lord," he prayed, "it needs rain so that its tender roots may drink and swell. Send gentle showers." And the Lord sent gentle showers. "Lord," prayed the monk, "my tree needs sun. Send sun, I pray thee." And the sun shone, gilding the dripping clouds. "Now frost, my Lord, to brace its tissues," cried the monk. And behold, the little tree stood sparkling with frost, but at evening it died.

Then the monk sought the cell of a brother monk and told his strange experience. "I, too, planted a little tree," he said, "and see! It thrives well. But I entrust my tree to God. He who made it knows better what it needs than a man like me. I laid no condition. I fixed not ways or means. 'Lord, send what it needs,' I prayed, 'storm or sunshine, wind, rain, or frost. Thou hast made it and Thou dost know'" (P.19).

This story was so good for me to hear because it reminded me of how often I pray for what I think I need, when really I should be praying for God to send me what He knows I need. He knows me better than I ever will and I love the quote: "He who made it knows better what it needs than a man like me." This is what God is telling me every day:

"Morgan, let Me be the Blessed Controller. Surrender. Accept my timing. Accept my ways. Accept my outcome. Let your trust be in Me alone. Morgan, make secret choices that will honor Me. Though no one sees your choices or knows how difficult they are, make them for Me."

a stir in me

2008-12-23T20:53:00.000-08:00

I have been meaning to blog for a few days now, but I have been super busy with the most random things. I know, I know; break is a time of rest and relaxation, but that has not been the case.

Random things in the past few days:

1)I got so emotional leaving CBU for this CHRISTmas break for some reason. As I was packing things up and checking girls out, I really felt God stirring something in my heart. I can't quite figure out what yet, but I feel like even though I am not done with this school year, last semester was a closing of some chapter in my life and next semester will be the start of a new one. That sounds weird. I don't know what was going on, but I kinda got choked up and may have cried before I left, may have... :)

2)Running in the rain yesterday was simply amazing and I have come to the conclusion that I think I like running in the rain better than in the sunshine. Even though it was absolutely freezing, I loved the feeling of running with the rain hitting my face; being outdoors just seems to speak to me.

3)We celebrated CHRISTmas tonight since we are leaving and I LOVE LOVE LOVE seeing the look on people's faces as they open gifts. That brings joy to my heart.

So these are just a few of the things, I wish I had my journal with me so I could write more of the things that I wanted to. Please keep my family in prayer as we travel to northern california. We keep hearing that the roads are rough and we don't want to get stranded, although I keep telling my family that would be awesome. OK so maybe a little cold and cramped, but what a great story to tell. I think I texted most of my friends saying Merry Early CHRISTmas, but if not: MERRY CHRISTMAS!! I am turning my phone off again until next Tuesday night.

a season of "wooing"

2008-12-14T21:13:00.000-08:00

Wooing. To "woo" someone is a verb; an action where someone is seeking to find affection with another individual and according to Webster, it usually ends in marriage. I always thought this was a funny word, but the thought of being "wooed" is actually rather intimate and personal.

Some of you may know that this semester I stepped out of my normal "personal" boundaries and actually let someone start to woo me. I have never been good with letting people in, out of fear of getting hurt, but this semester I did. I let someone pursue the thought of getting to know me on a more intimate level and I must say, that the pure thought that knowing someone so desperately wants to get to know you because they want to be with you forever is simply breathtaking. It's that type of thing where your heart kind of skips a beat when you know that someone truly desires to know your desires and makes an effort at speaking to you in your own love language.

I let this person take me out on weekly dates just the two of us and I truly seeked getting to know Him better too. [If the suspense is killing you as to who this mystery man is, just be patient...that is something that I have learned this semester; patience.] Anyways, tonight I took a break from studying and went on my last weekly date before the winter break with this man. It was simply amazing. We walked around the plaza drinking coffee and talking about, well personal stuff, and then ended the night in the Word. I don't know if I have ever felt more spoken to in awhile. OK OK, you have probably figured out that this mystery man is my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ by my capital "Him's" and talk of "seeking" each other; sorry, I just had to start this thing out a little more creative.

The point of this is: God is a God that truly seeks to be the lover of our souls. He wants to know the depths of us and our inner-most desires. He wants to be the center of our life and talk to us constantly throughout the day, not just before meals and as you crawl into bed. Getting to know Him this semester on an intimate level was seriously the most amazing thing I could have ever challenged myself to do. Talk about being "wooed," He is the ULTIMATE wooer; if that is even a word. Currently, as talked about in my previous blog, Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing is my favorite song. I have been researching and breaking down every line in that song, trying to figure out why it has been sticking out to me. While on tonights little date, that song played to my heart instead of my head through my little, pink headphones. This is the main part that I heard: Let thy goodness, like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee...here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for the courts above. Then I realized; I am in love with this song because this is my desire: I want God to bind my heart to His, like a fetter. [a fetter are those iron shackles that were put around prisoners feet as to ensure they could not run away]. I want to give Him my heart and make sure that He helps me take care of it for when I go home to Him.

We are commanded to "guard our hearts for it is the wellspring of life" (Proverbs 4:23), but I don't think that meant to guard our hearts from Him. I know so many people that stay guarded even in their prayers out of fear that God will see them for who they really are or something crazy like that, let me tell you a secret: HE ALREADY KNOWS. Open up and let Him in. Embrace the love He so longingly wants to give you and allow for Him to change you into the woman or man that you are supposed to become in His image.

Better yet: Let Him take you out on a date. Say "yes" because He wants to woo you, now you just have to let Him...

my ebenezer

2008-12-09T14:35:00.000-08:00

Come Thou Font of Every Blessing.

This was a hymn written in 1758 by a man named Robert Robinson. I don't know if everyone has heard this song, but it stresses the joy of Christianity and the immense need for Christians to rely fully on the Lord. One of the verses in this hymn says, "Here I raise my ebenezer." What in the heck is that? I mean sometimes we sing this in church, but the first thing that comes to my mind is Ebenezer Scrooge and the story of Christmas. I think this is what first spurred my interest.

Anyway, the term ebenezer means: my rock or stone of help. This verse about ebenezer in the hymn is actually a quote from 1 Samuel and it is describing the battle between the Philistines and the Israelites and long-story short, Samuel raises a stone that he calls ebenezer, to remind his people of how God was faithful in helping them in battle.

So how does this apply to me writing this blog? I think that with this season of finals and busy-ness of life that I feel caught up in, today God graciously gave me some amazing alone time with Him in the prayer chapel and in reading the Bible they have in there, I was reminded that no matter what happens in life, finals, school, whatever, God will always be faithful in helping me with whatever "Battles" I may be in.

In light of the Christmas season, I bought a new Bible today [along with a new bible highlighter, which is basically a more expensive colored pencil] and realized that my Bible, is my version of Samuel's ebenezer. Any time that I feel down or impatient or simply need something to put my problems or fears on, I can look at my Bible and be reminded of all the promises that are in it. The Bible is a tangible object that represents my rock, my stone of help, my ebenezer: my Lord and Savior Christ Jesus.

i like this version, very calming:

a week of thanks

2008-11-30T15:21:00.000-08:00

This past week of being with my family was seriously amazing. I love these people so much and even though some of them live close, I feel as though I still don't really get to see them often. So for Thanksgiving this year, my family left to go see my grandparents and the rest of my family up in northern california in a little town called: Cedarville. After classes and being on "duty" Tuesday night, I flew up to Reno, Wednesday morning, where my cousin Cassie picked me up to drive four additional hours to the rest of the family and that is where it all began. I just wanted to post a few pictures, those that meant the most to me and could describe my trip best. If you want to see more check out my facebook in the album titled: more like a week of thanks. :)

this is the before and after shot of my dinner plate:)

here are a few shots of me cutting my cousin and my dad's hair....

and this is my grandpa's GOLF card game face...

this are some shots before we went shooting and during...

this is the cutest little puppy named PANDA...
and that is a picture of my sister, Lauren, and I as we travel the long road home. nothing says road trip like a nice cup-o-joe, mascara from the night before, and a hoodie. So what was I most thankful for this Thanksgiving? F.A.M.I.L.Y.

questioning God's existence

2008-11-21T23:06:00.000-08:00

I don't think that I will ever truly understand God, but frankly I am ok with that. I am ok with not being able to describe something so unbelievably indescribable because why would I want to limit my God to my human words? He is so much more than any word or words that I could come up with.

You may be wondering what is the purpose and meaning of my title and what is that strange picture on the top right; or maybe you have heard of laminin and can already guess what I might write about. Before I begin to explain, I feel as though I should preface this blog with this: I was always raised in a loving home, but I remember a time in my life when I questioned God's existence. I remember crying in my room and saying, "there is no possible way that there is a God" and feeling so unbelievably alone. Each person has a different story to tell and I am forever grateful and in awe of the way that God has transformed my life.

Recently, I was on a mini-staff retreat with my church and in one of our sessions, we watched a sermon by a guy with the last name Giglio [the first name slips me, sorry]. Now, I have heard many times about the "size of the universe" and "all the things that my body does without me knowing," but this sermon mentioned something I have never heard before [maybe you have]. It talked about our body having a certain cell body that we could not possibly live without, because to put in simple terms: it is the glue that holds everything inside of us together. LAMININ. Laminin is a cell structure composed of three parts: "b" chain, "g" chain, and an "a" chain. This cell structure is the "glue" in a sense that holds all the cells we have in our body together. [You can see the picture of this in the top right corner of my blog.]

Notice the shape of this "glue." Notice it is made up of THREE parts. Hmmm...it would appear to be in the shape of a cross and coincidentally, our God is a triune God meaning he is also made up of three parts; Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit. With all of this information, it would seem impossible for one to read this and still be able to question God's existence. Believe me, had I heard this back when I was struggling with the mere concept of God, it would have been extremely hard for me to continue to think that there was no God.

"He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by Him all things were created, things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authority; all things were created by Him and for Him. He is before all things, and in Him all things HOLD TOGETHER" (Colossians 1:15-17). ALL THINGS HOLD TOGETHER.

Do you realize that there are tens of thousands of these little cross-shaped Laminin in your body? God designed us this way from the very beginning. How can people hear things like this and still not believe? Better yet, how can one look out into the ocean; witness something miraculous like a baby being born; watch the sun rise or set; or simply see someone as broken as I used to be, transform into something that continuously leaves me without words; and still be able to question God's existence? God is an omniscient [infinitely aware, complete knowledge], omnipresent [present at all times], and omnipotent [almighty] God. He is indescribable and we are truly undeserved of His mercy and grace.

LOVE vs HATE

2008-11-11T16:16:00.000-08:00

How do you respond to people in regards to PROP 8 when they say PROP 8 = HATE and think this proposition is Christian's expressed hate towards homosexuals? Now this is the tricky part of the question because I know that one could easily refer to the Bible and God's design for marriage, but for those people that instantly are turned off as soon as God or the Bible are brought up, are there ways one could answer this question from a secular point of view to express that it is not "hate?"

If yes, then how would one go about answering this?

Or, since this is a societal moral issue, does one still bring God into the answer and hope that the listening receipient does not take it as having the Gospel crammed down their throat? It is invitable that people are not going to like any answer but the one that tells them "they can get what they want," but then what is the best way to answer this question?

Something that I heard in a discussion today was maybe first start off by asking what that person's definition of "hate" is and then go about answering it that way. Which is a good idea, but then how do you continue it from there...

Hmmm...this is such a sticky situation. Like Pandora's Box was just opened and now who knows what is going to happen. I feel like this proposition will definitely make it to the ballots again. I want to be prepared in my answers and not sound like the "hypocritical" Christian. What are your guys' thoughts on this...

Romans 13:1

2008-11-04T23:26:00.000-08:00

Regardless of who you voted for: as Christ followers we need to pray for Obama and Biden and their time in office. God already knew the outcome of this election. We have to trust that He will be present and sovereign in everything that is to come...

11-04-08

2008-11-02T12:53:00.000-08:00

This day is going to make history. I am not going to tell you which way to vote, but I am going to tell you TO VOTE!!! Every vote counts guys :)

GET OUT THERE AND ROCK THE VOTE!!!

crazy love

2008-10-26T22:25:00.000-07:00

read this. simply amazing.

SEX and chocolate

2008-10-19T15:46:00.000-07:00

I don't understand why some people put such a negative connotation on that word: SEX. Sex was not meant to be a bad thing, it was created to be something beautiful between a man and a woman ONCE they are married. It's a gift from God and yet society makes it out to be something so negative that when I made signs for our "sex and chocolate" event, someone actually ripped off the word SEX from my sign. I spent 6 hours making signs and posters to plaster the school with and then someone steals one word from the sign? WHY? Were you offended by the word or are you simply perverted and have it hanging up in your room?

I don't know if people knew that event was meant to answer questions about being able to protect our heart with all the sexual desires in this world. Even though people ripped down signs, parents called the school complaining and students decided to go to Dr. Ellis; over 130 girls came to the event Friday night and I think that it went SOOO unbelievably well. There are tons of questions that girls AND boys have about sex from both a biblical and secular standpoint and this event was meant to answer those questions, which I feel that it did.

Just a heads up: THERE WILL BE A SEX AND CHOCOLATES PART TWO FOR MEN AND WOMEN NEXT SEMESTER and I encourage everyone to go. It was seriously so helpful even just to know that everyone else is struggling just as much as you, when it seems we are alone because for some reasons a lot of so-called "Christians" like to act like they are perfect.

If we were perfect then please tell me: what is holding Jesus up on that cross? Our "perfectness?" NO. Our sins. The Bible says that "all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God..." (Romans 3:23)...

It's time to get real about our struggles with each other. We will never be able to overcome sin if we do it alone, we are called for fellowship...I challenge everyone to get an accountability group or partner. Share your struggles, pray to get over them, but realize that you most likely DO HAVE a sin that you are struggling with. You are not perfect. NO ONE IS EXCEPT JESUS. It's hard to get over something alone, we need each other. For all you visual people: When you go rock-climbing, can you do it alone? No, right? You need someone watching you and holding onto your rope to make sure that you don't fall and even if you slip down a little bit, your partner never lets you hit rock bottom...

my prayer for now...

2008-10-02T11:53:00.000-07:00

"...Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me your heart for the once forgotten..."

-Brandon Heath

October fast approaching

2008-09-29T12:40:00.000-07:00

Oh life. The saying that "when it rains, it pours" rings true for my life. I think that I mentioned in my previous blog that I was an intern this summer at my church working in the children's department and absolutely loved it. This was a summer of growth for me and then school started. I won't sit here and complain about things that have happened already as this year has began, but one thing I will say is that sometimes I wish I wasn't so empathetic because there have been days where I have been too emotionally affected by other people's problems as if they were my own and it has started to take an effect on me. There have been times where I wish that I didn't care so much. Some of my close friends that I have talked to about this have said I should see this as more of a blessing that I can "feel for other people" the way that I do. Granted, it can be a beautiful thing to feel other people's pain, but a curse all at the same time.

One thing that I said I wanted to do this year was be genuine in the relationships that I am making and I feel as though I have. I have been making an effort to genuinely seek friendships and have that genuine love in spending time with them. Another goal that I would like to add to my list of this year is this, and you are more than welcome in helping pray that I attain this goal this school year:

That the Lord would grant me patience and not just all of a sudden BAM I have patience, but I guess that He would give me more opportunities to be patient. I got a book from a friend and there was a chapter on patience that was simply amazing. It called patience the "act of slowing." This is such a good way to look at things.

I need to slow down my life and take time to simply "smell the roses" as some would put it. [Thus the reasoning for my current facebook profile picture] So what do I want patience for?? EVERYTHING! life, boys, relationships, family, personal spiritual growth, just patience to get through the day. I am such an impatient person and I need to try and fix that!

blah blah blah...you are probably sick of reading this babble, if people even read these lol

a new year

2008-09-03T21:50:00.000-07:00

well...the new school year is fastly approaching...umm less then 2 hours away to be exact and i really don't feel as though i am ready to start just yet. this summer was AMAZING to say the least and i truly feel as though i grew not only as a person, but also spiritually. i saw God in so many unbelievable ways this summer it was mind-blowing: from working with the kids in Germany, to building houses in Mexico, leading my junior highers in their walk with the Lord this summer, doing an internship with my church and spending some legit quality time with my family that was much needed.

some things that i AM looking forward to are:

1- my first year as an RA and getting to know my residents :)
2- applying to be an ISP leader
3- seeing what things God will teach me this year
4- growing more in all aspects of life

there is seriously so much that i want to write, but i am already REALLY tired and school hasn't even started yet haha...wish me luck in my first day of class!

xoxo

MoP

deutschland return

2008-05-29T19:41:00.000-07:00

So Germany was amazing! God did GREAT things there and I was definitely stretched on that trip. There is too much to write, just know that God truly had a hand in everything that we did there. One of the most beautiful things is feeling as though you are truly living your life the way that God wants you too. That feeling was felt numerous times in Germany. If you have questions and want to know more than feel free to write to me and ask, but besides that, all I can say is this: GOD IS SO GOOD:)

guten nacht<3

Destination: Germany

2008-05-04T22:38:00.000-07:00

Well, my ISP team leaves Tuesday the 6th from the Globe at CBU at 3:30 PM if anyone wants to go see us at our departure! We are heading to Munich, Germany where we are putting on all different types of sports camps...please pray for us while we are gone. We get back on the 26th :)

The Final Push

2008-04-28T21:12:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is officially my last day as a sophomore. Wow. Weird feeling. I don't know if you read in my first blog about the overwhelming feelings that are experienced during this last week of finals, but I decided right now as I sit in my apartment alone and have what some would call "emo" music playing, that I am really sad. I thought that I would be REALLY excited that summer is here, but to tell you the truth; I am really sad. I realized how many of my friends are graduating and that makes my heart so sad; most of them are not from around here and that makes it even worse. Another thing that I hate is that I have started to make a lot of really good friends in this "last stretch" of school and now that we are finally getting close, they have to leave. What the heck?? Is anyone else starting to feel this way??? Am I all alone on this?? Maybe it's because i'm a girl...which means i'm emotional haha

Realizing death is closer than I thought it could be

2008-04-25T23:43:00.000-07:00

So I was driving home tonight around 10:45 and THE scariest thing ever happened! I was in the lane next to the fast lane, right near box springs (which is an exit in my hometown)...and the stupid car in front of me decided to swirve totally out of nowhere without giving any signal or sign in advance...at the time I was thinking, "what was that all about?"
Then I saw that there was a fatty washing machine in the middle of the lane and realized if I hit that large mass, I was going to flip my little civic and roll into the ditch! There was a car on either side of me; so I looked at the guy on the left with a second to decide before something terrible happened and I think he saw the look of sheer fear and panic go across my face becasue he immediately slowed WAYYYY down so that I could swirve; BARELY missing that washer!

Man-oh-man. That was scary. Don't worry, I called the cops to report the missing washer in case they wanted to come and pick it up to save other people from possibly hitting it causing them to run home and blog about it too. If I was that scared, I can only imagine what the car in front of me was thinking. All I know is that as all this was happening, I remembered that Mical had already said goodnight, Hillary knew that I went home for the night so she wouldn't be expecting me back at school, and my mom was already in bed. That meant that no one would have known I died until the morning when my mom woke up and noticed me missing. Okay, so this is a farely dramatic blog: so what? I was scared and this is the only way I can truly make you feel as though you were right there with me :)

Late Night Life

2008-04-24T04:28:00.000-07:00

Okkk so the time is 4:31am and I am STILL awake. What is that? I am a person that normally does not function well on less than 6 hours of sleep at night. What am I talking about? That's a lie. I do not function well on less than 8 hours of sleep a night and if I can sleep for more than that I am always more than willing to jump at that chance. Ask my best friend Mical. Or should I say my mom. She has to drag me out of bed every morning. I really don't know what I would do without that girl. [I love you Cal].

Anyways, I am up and it is already a new day and the only reason that I am still up at this late hour is because Caitlin and I have to study for a final that will probably still kick our butt tomorrow. I admit, we have been distracted by quite stimulating AIM conversations, but we have still been studying to say the least.

So why the blog if I have so much to do? Hmmmmm....good question. I don't even know if people actually read these things. There is a little box that says "PROFILE VIEWS" and the number is well into the 20's, which would seem to be a good thing considering that I just made this thing last night, but is that number even acurrate? I have NO idea. I click the refresh button and the number increases. So the amount of times that I look at my own page must be included in this number.

Important Things I learned today

Sometimes getting lost in a two hour conversation about life is better than taking that time to study...you'll remember your conversations with your friends more than you will remember some "facts" you learned for some final, for some class you took for some year in college.
People can surprise you. Testimonies are fascinating to me. That old saying "never judge a book by its cover" rang true today...
Although I have recently been on a little thing that texting, AIM, and other forms of communication, besides in person, are impersonal; I have found that AIM can be a sufficient way to get to know someone. Yes, I do think that one still needs to have actual, face-to-face interaction with people, but the internet is still a sufficient means for these purposes.
Lastly, going to Denny's at 3 in the morning is so much better than the time that most "normal" people would go and for the following reasons: there is hardly anyone there to interrupt the conversation, food is served faster which means that it is hotter, your drink is constantly being refilled before you get a chance to finish the first cup because you have the waiter's full attention since no one else is around, you leave the restaurant expecting an empty parking lot, only to find that there is quite a long line of people ready to set up their flea market stands so in an attempt to bypass this 4-in-the-morning traffic, you are only slowed down by the extremely slow driver that has no idea his parking lights are on instead of his headlights, but most of all, because some of the best memories are made after midnight. :)

The end approaching

2008-04-22T23:54:00.000-07:00

As I approach the end of my second year in college, I find myself full of a variety of different emotions: anxious, happy, stressed, sad and many other words that are not coming to mind due to the fact that my brain is complete mush in this season of finals.

Even though I am only going to be a junior, I feel as though I am at a point in my life where I have a lot of important decisions to make that will dictate my future. It's a scary thought: my future. I recently turned 20 and in turning another year older, I feel a sense of doubt in "life after college." Have I chosen the right major, am I taking the right classes to graduate on time, am I really trusting in the Lord and being faithful in making all my decisions glorifying to Him? When I sit here in my living room by myself, I feel as though all these questions are consuming my mind. I hate the feeling of an uneasy mind. It's the type of thing that makes me toss and turn while laying (laying, lying; who knows? I don't think I listened that year in English) in bed, unable to fall asleep because I have so many thoughts running through my mind.

Well anyway, I am unsure how this whole "blog" thing works. My inspiration to write was because of Courtney Weatherly and her amazing blogspot. Pretty much she is one of the coolest girls on campus and guess what boys? she is SINGLE!!! hollaaaaa:) okk I am going back to my "study" mode where I atttempt to do homework and study for finals, but constantly get sucked into some AIM conversation.

xoxo<3 Mo